Wednesday, August 27, 2008

You know You are from Kathmandu when....

You know You are from Kathmandu when....

You’re born in Nepal!
You’re in our KTM!
You can sing this song… ” super top, ma hun super top… ma luga lai seto paarchu…”

If somebody touches your neck, u need to blow air in their hand (fuu fuu)…

You shake your head to say yes or ok.

Your are asked, “hatti baliyo ki hatti chap chapal”, you reply, you say “ustai ustai ho”.

You watch english and hindi movies more than nepali movies.

Boys court girls from the street.

Todays rice is tomorrows fried rice.

You have time to speak,but you dont have time to listen.

You’re at least a lil anti indian from your heart.

You chichyai chichyai boling on the phone.

You pronounce ‘YUM’ for ‘M’.

You point with your lips.

You get annoyed when people think you are from Naples.

Whenever you meet someone you ask, ” Have you had your food?” ( bhat khayao?)

You meet someone in a movie hall and ask, ” Have you come to watch a movie?” ( cinema herna ayeko?)

You laugh at everything on Nepali TV but you still watch it.

Covering your nose everytime you pass through the bridge becomes a reflex.

Your conversation with any Nepali you just met always ends up being an interview to unearth the degree of association with this person. (eh…Ghar ka?? Lazimpat? Tyeso bhaye timile xyz lai chinchhau??)

You are crossing a one way street and you have to check both sides.

Your relatives give you money whenever you visit them.

You call anyone rajesh hamal if he has a long back-hair.

You go out for lunch/ dinner/ whatever in a group and look at the menu for half an hour and order the following:
1. momo
2. chilli chips
3. fried rice
4. chicken chilli

You think of titaura and your saliva glands go wild !!

You miss wai wai, rara and titaura and churpi…

You are good at drunk driving, especially on motorcycles…

Using a spoon becomes awkward!

You are afraid to step on any paper, or pen (You don’t want to piss off Saraswati and flunk an exam).

Your White Friends Ask If you’ve Climbed Mount Everest!

You can bribe anyone even the Cops.

You know ganja is REALLY cheap!

You translate rap songs into nepali as a pass time hobby. example “mero hapsis nachdain, khali pant mathi sarchan. ani dhunga tadha, dhunga tadha.

you accidently ask for an e-sprite and an e-snickers bar

you’re in Kathmandu, you find Mo:mo shops every other block… yumm..

u finally think uve perfected yor bargaining skills, but come bak ripped off…

You are used to cows sitting down in the middle of the road during a traffic jam.

You wonder why the Maoists are being so quiet these days, & then you realize that you aren’t in kathmandu

You know that mango fruity is FRESH AND JUICY!!

Chiya is even better if you put cheura in it

Dogs barking don’t stop you sleeping…

Boiling and filtering and boiling water again is part of everyday life…

Your initial instinct on a sunny day is to stay in the shade…

Winter only lasts three months…

Most if not all houses have balconies…

You know that fire and ice is the best pizza place ever

Sitting on the front seat of a taxi feels like you’re in a video game

Friday, August 22, 2008

Company Rules And Regulations.… Very Funny…. Must Read....

Dress Code


It is advised that you come to work dressed according to your salary.

If we see you wearing Prada shoes and carrying a Gucci bag, we assume you are doing well financially and therefore do not need a raise.

If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better,so that you may buy nicer clothes, and therefore do not need a raise.

If you dress just right, you are right where you need to be and therefore do not need a raise.

Sick Days

We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof of sickness.

If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.

Personal Days

Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called
Saturday and Sunday.

Toilet Use

Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet. There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the stalls.

At the end of the three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall door will open and a picture will be taken.

After your second offence, your picture will be posted on the company bulletin board under the "Chronic Offenders category".

Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be sectioned under the company's mental health policy!

You are allowed to use the rest room only thrice a day and you have to swipe in and out from the toilet doors also.

Lunch Break

Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch as they need to eat more, so that they can look healthy.

Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to maintain their average figure.

Fat people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's all the time needed to drink a slim fast.

Mails

Don't read junk and forwarded mails.


Thank you for your loyalty to our company.

We are here to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore,

All questions, comments, concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations, accusations,Contemplations, consternation and input should be directed elsewhere.

Famous Movie Quotes & Dialogues - I

For very long time, I was thinking to write a post on Famous Movie Quotes And Famous hindi Movies romantic dialogues. Finally, here are some of my favorite Bollywood Movie Dialogues. Enjoy these Popular movie quotes and if you hve not found your favorite one, then feel free to submit it.

  1. "Bade bade desho mein aisi chhoti chhoti baatein hoti rehti hein." This is much famous dialogue of shahrukh khan from movie "Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge". This is my one of the favorite dialogue.

  1. "I can talk in english, i can walk in english, i can laugh in english. Because english is very funny language." This famous funny dialogue is spoken by Evergreen Super Star Mr. Amitabh Bachhan in movie Namak Halal.

  1. “Don ka intzaar to gyarah mulko ki police kar rahi hai Sonia, Lekin itna jan lo ki DON ko pakadna mushkil hi nahi, na mumkin hai." This jaandar Dialogue is spoken by Mr.Amitabh Bachhan in Movie DON and repeated by Shahrukh in

Movie DON 2.

  1. "Mohabbat bhi zindagi ki tarah hoti hai, har mod aasan nahi hota, har mod par khushi nahi milti.... Par jab hum zindagi ka saath nahi chodte to hum mohabbat ka saath kyon chhode." So ramantic naa. Any guesses about the name of the movie this dialogue taken from....guess.....................................yes, you are right. It is from movie Mohabbatein. I thinks this is the movie full of Romantic Dialogues.

  1. "Tum soch rahi hogi ki main yeh rece kyo haar gaya. Main yeh race tumhare liye har gaya. Tumhi ne kaha tha ne ki mere dad ke saamne ye iki, riki, piki sab fail ho jaate hai. Kabhi-kabhi kuch jitne ke liye kuch haarna padta hai Aur haar kar jitne wale ko Baazigar kehte hai." Have you remembered this dialogue. Sahi pehchana, you are right boss. This quote is from Action Thriller Bazzigar.

  1. AMRISH PURI who is not any more with us. I like his voice very much. He has got very DAMDAAR AWAAZ. "Mogambo khush hua -" This is his famous dialogue from movie Mr. INDIA.

  1. AAJ ....aaj ek zindagi aur jeelo .aaj ek hasin aur baathlo, aaj ek sapna aur dekhlo , aaj ek aason aur peelo, aaj ek dua aur maanglo ... AAJ ...kya pata....... kal ho na ho " This quote is one of my favorite. It makes me feel that I should live every moment of life.This quotes is from movie Kal Ho Na Ho. It inspires me a lot. This is one of My favroute movie.

  1. "Yeh bacchhon ke khelne ki cheez nahi, haath kat jaaye toh khoon nikal aata hai." This DHAASU 'N' JAANDAR dialogue is from movie Waqt which is directed by YASH CHOPRA.

Monday, August 11, 2008

The A B C D..... Of Life


The Alphabet Of Life

File & Folders

SAVE THE FILE or FOLDERS WITH NO NAME

Don't Want A Folder To Have Name? Here Is The Trick....

If you do not want a folder to have a name

then Right click on the folder and on rename

while renaming press alt + 0160 (or the numbers of Your choice)

the numbers should be pressed from the numpad


Friday, August 1, 2008

Aam Hain Kya?

Aam Hain Kya....?

A parrot goes to a shopkeeper and asks ... 'Aam hai kya?'

The shopkeeper says... 'Nahi. Hum Aam nahi bechate.'

.
.
.

Next day at the same time, the parrot goes again and asks him... 'Aam
hai kya?'

He gets a little irritated and says... 'Aare Bola na, Hum Aam nahi
Bechate'

.
.
.

On the third day, the parrot goes again and asks him 'Aam hai kya?'

He gets wild and yells ... 'Bola na nahin. Abhi waapas aaya to hathoda
maaroonga sar ke oopar'

.
.
.

The next day, the parrot comes again and asks him...'hathoda hai kya?'


The shopkeeper says... 'Nahi'


The parrot then asks ... 'Aam hain kya?

Pappu Cant Code Saala : Funny Version....

Pappu Cant Code Saala....

[Kit kit kat kat, kat kit kat kat, Kit kit kat kat, Let's code] 2

Hai bachelor (hai bachelor), Has lotsa dollar (lotsa dollar)...

Hai bachelor, has lotsa dollar...

Spectacular! He's a developer (he's a developer, he's a developer)...

Pappu ka dimaag tez hai, Pappu ko breaks ka craze hai...

Pappu ka chashma thick black, Pappu dikhta geek hai (geek hai)...

Swatch ki ghadi hathon mein, Gale mein tag company wala...

[Par Pappu can't code saala] 2

Han Pappu code likh nahi sakta!






Paida Pappu hua to outsourcing aa thamki...

Angrezon ke muh se nikhli gandhe gaaliyon ki dhamki...

(hey array array) Pappu karta hey cut copy paste...

(hey array array) Tester logon ka time karta hey waste...

(hey array array) Pappu manager logon ka yaar hai...

(hey array array) Pappu beer peene mein toh star hai...

[But Pappu can't code saala] 2

Haan Pappu code likh nahi sakta!




Papa kehte the bada kaam karega...

Nahi patha tha Pappu bus maska marega...

(hey array array) Pappu ke paas hai MBA...

(hey array array) Manata hai onsite jaise ho holiday...

(hey array array) Pappu keyboard bajata hai...

(hey array array) Jahaan bhi jata hai, wapus aa jata hai...

[Cos Pappu can't code saala] 2

Haan Pappu code likh nahi sakta...

Yeah...Pappu can't code saala...!!!

Om Shanti Om

Filmy Examz....OSO Style....


Om shanti Om ka dialogue Students ke andaaz mein ...




Itni shiddat se maine paas hone ki koshish ki hai,,,,,




ki har teacher ne mujhe marks na dene ki saazish ki hai,,,,,




Agar tum kisi paper mein paas hona chahte ho,,,




to saari kaaynat tumhe usko paas karane me lag jati hai,,,,,,




Ye exams bhi apne hindi filmon ki tarah hote hain,,,,,




end tak sab kuch achha ho hi jata hai-HAPPYYYYS ENDINGGGGS......




aur agar aisa nahi hota,,,,,






toh exam abhi khatam nahi hua,

.

.

.

.

SUPPLEMENTARY abhi baaki hai mere dost................ ha ha ha.












"35 marks ki kimat,

tum kya jaano lecturer babu.....

35 marks har student ka khwaab hota hai.....

35 marks har year ke student k sir ka taaj hota hai...

SPAM MAILS

JUNK Mail Conversation b/w Krishna & Arjuna of Mahabharata

Krishna: Apne se badon ke email ka aadar samman karna seekho, Arjun

Arjun: Main apne hi kul ke aadarniya logon ko junk email kaise bhej
sakta hoon, Vasudev ?

Krishna : Is samay yeh tumhare mitra ya shatru nahi hain paarth. Vey keval pratidvandvi hain. Islike kshatriya dharm ka paalan karo. Login karo our bhejo junk mail by the dozen - yahi tumhara kartavya hai or yahee tumhara dharma hai.

Arjun : Hai muraree ise dekh ker to lagat hai mein software industry hee chod doon.

Krishna : Vats tum mohmaya mein fans gaye hai. Is jagat mein na koi tumhara hai, na tum kisi ke ho. Ye sabhee junk mail mein hee bhejta hoon, tum to ek nimitt matra ho. tum se pahle bhee ye junk mail thee or tumhare baad bhee rahegee. Is mohmaya se ooper utho, karm karo. De-danadan junk mail bhejo.

Arjun : Kintu, iska parinam kya hoga, hey Devaki nandan ?!

Krishna : Vijay ya parajay tumhare vash mein nahi hai. Issliye parinam ke bare mien sochna band kar do. Tumhe Guru Dronacharya ne junk-shastra ki siksha dei hai (EECS101). Use nasht mat hone do... jab bhi sensible stuff increase ho jaata hai, prithvi mein mera AOL account khulta hai. Aur main karodon junk mail bhej kar sabko pareshan kar deta hoon.

Arjun : Hey Keshav, Junk mail ka system se kya connection hai ?

Krishna : Junk mail junk mail hi hai, iska hardware se koi naata nahin. Jis tarah se aatma ek sharir ko chod kar doosre mein pravesh karti hai,usi tarah se junk mail bhi system to system travel karta hai.

Arjun : Junk mail ki paribhasha kya hai ?

Krishna : Isse na agni jala sakti hai, na varun bhiga sakti hai, na hi yeh jeeta ja sakta hai na hi haara ja sakta hai. Isse bhejne wale ka swayam Mahadev bhi kuch nahi bigad sakte hain.Junk mail amar hai.

Arjun : Hey Narayan ! Abhi mere saare fande clear ho gaye hain. Yashodanandan aapne meree aankhe khol dee, nahin to mein is mohmaya mein pad ker saree junk mail khud hee padh leta.

And Arjun needless to say, sends a hoard of junk mails, killing everyone..


Computer Conversation

Tapori Computer Language Conversation

CHOTA DRIVE and UPS DADA are two gundas of their places but chota drive thinks that he's a bigger "gunda" then UPS dada so he decides to fire some words to him. Both like to conversate using a very different and very familiar language....

CHOTA DRIVE: abey UPS.....
abey oo...apun ka mail notification nahi mil raha kya....
abey....kyon be tere woofer mein apna voice mail nahi bajrela kya..

UPS DADA: abey sale pen drive is aulad....tu apne ko is mohalle ka microsoft samajhta hai kya....jyada spamming mat kar mere samne.....or apni pen drive nikal mere USB port se......samjha kya.....CLICK DABAKE

CHOTA DRIVE: abey mere pass to pen drive hai par tere pas to woh bhi nahi hai.......hahaha...apne LCD ki screen saaf kar aur dekh tere samne kaun khada hai....

UPS DADA: abe sale......pata nahi startup mein desktop mein kiska wallpaper dekh liya tha jo tere jaise Trojan se pala pada hai......jyada mere processor ka use mat kar.....aur jaldi se yahan se patli gali se logoff hoja.......nahi to mere antiviruses tere repair kar dalenge......CLICK DABAKE

CHOTA DRIVE: abey teri motherboard ka......tu janta nahi hai yahan jitne bhi mawali user log hain na....apun in sabka master user hai.....samjha kya...

UPS DADA: abey tu user kya sale guest user bhi banne layak nahi hai.....agar main vista ultimate hoon na to..tu to sale windows 98 bhi nahi hai........pata hai user log (telling to his own tapori members)...yeh sala ek bar kisi ka system hack karne gaya tha, baad mein pata chala ki iska khud ka processor ki speed hi kum hai.....hahaha....CLICK DABAKE

CHOTA DRIVE: aye apun ko teri downloading pasand aareli hai.....tu janta hai sale apun hai CHOTA DRIVE par hai HARD DRIVE se bhi jyada dangerous kya....apun ko 12 local servers ke users google search rele hain par CHOTA DRIVE ko find karna mushkil hi nahi namumkin hai......isliye tere ko bolta hoon apne sath tere files share karle.....tera bhi fayda hojayega..

UPS DADA: abey shareware kahin ke...........openoffice type ke ghatiye software ...tu sale mujh jaise microsoft office se muqabla karna chahta hai......abhi tere ko kharcha-pani dena hi padeka.....CLICK DABAKE

now tapori members of UPS DADA speak.....

KASPERSKY ANTIVIRUS: are dada tum OK Click karo to abhi ke abhi isko repair kar dalunga......

HATELA LAPTOP : dada tum bolo to isko shutdown kar dalunga......

UPS DADA: (speaking to the members) are tum log thoda standby hojao.......(speaking to CHOTA DRIVE)dekha USB port chatnewale....mere pass kitne antivirus hain....Kaspersky, Norton, avast...CLICK DABAKE.....or tere pass...

CHOTA DRIVE: are to kya hua.....mere pass Ashampoo Antivirus hai..

UPS DADA and his members laughing.......

UPS DADA: hahaha.....sale tu to softwares ke naam pe dhabba hai.....(speaking to nero 7)aye nero 7, is DVD ko burn kar daal....

nero 7: haan dada.....sala chota drive ko burn kardunga woh bhi multisession ke sath taki sali koi kasar baki rahe jaye to bad mein isko aur burn karunga..hahahaha..

CHOTA DRIVE: abe ruk jao yaar.....mmmmm.....me....mein...mein to yahan aap logon ki forum join karne aya tha.....mein abse apke hi under mein sare files(HAFTA) collect karunga......(immediately starting to massage UPS DADA's legs)...dada aap to mere guru ho.......aur mere ko thodi problem hai......

UPS DADA: chal theek hai bidu.....tere ko aur tere doosre pop-ups ko yahan allow karta hoon.....CLICK DABAKE

CHOTA DRIVE: (immediately starting to massage UPS DADA's legs)...dada aap to mere guru ho.......aur mere ko thodi problem hai......

UPS DADA: kya problem hai......bolna CLICK DABAKE

CHOTA DRIVE: apun ka.....mmmm.....apunka pendrive bahut chota hai..ise bada kaise kare..(interuppted inbetween by dada)

UPS DADA: (pushing chota drive)...abey sale door hat.......tune kya isko kya bahut accha forum samjha hai kya jo apni personal problems yahan solve karaega........chal logoff hoja yahan se nahin to shutdown kardalonga.....CLICK DABAKE

 
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